I'll Be Your Secret
by scififreak
Summary: Two people come together and find what they have been looking for.


I'LL BE YOUR SECRET   
  
  
  


Author's note: I wrote this at like the beginning of the show so don't flame me for taking Cordelia out of character. This was written in regards to her personality at the time it was written. I personally think the story could be Cordy now or in the past (accept for the long, dark hair).

Rated: PG-13 (yeah, Annika I know)

Characters: You'll see. I don't own them they belong to Joss W. and the WB

Summary: Two people come together and find what they have been looking for.

She was beautiful and very aware of it. When she walked down the street she knew every eye was upon her. From her long, dark, and gleaming hair, to her full and heavy breasts, to the perfectly rounded curves of her thighs...She was woman. The perfect example of what a woman should be. It was figures like hers that had guided the hands of Grecian sculptors who were enamored with the female form; burned the eyes of painters who rushed to put every detail to canvas lest they forget even a single mole; Or poets who spoke of them like goddesses and almost set paper aflame with words that could barely be whispered without losing ones breath.

And that is what she was- beautiful, but it was not who she was. No one ever looked below the surface of the diamond to see the cracks beneath it. She was numb and almost empty from too many years of not being seen. Every assault and injury to her spirit left another crack on her soul. One day it would shatter and she would be truly empty. She would be nothing but a porcelain doll- pretty on the outside completely hollow on the inside.

She kept it all inside and together by putting on an act that had almost everyone fooled. Every once in a awhile in a moment of weakness the veil was dropped and you got a glimpse of a pained soul and a little girl begging for acceptance. But then just as soon as it was seen it was gone. The actress was back in character. Now all you could see was a sarcastic snob worried more about her make-up and image then the problems of others.

That was his impression of her when they had first met. But when he looked deeper (something few did) he saw more, much more. As someone looking for redemption he certainly recognized the same longing and need in others. When he moved to L.A. to start anew and escape some of his past he had been surprised to learn that she was there. No doubt trying to do the same thing. She joined him in his quest to save lives. Hoping that maybe in the process she could save her own as well. In this unlikely partnership of need and obligation they both had found something unexpected- love. He had loved before but this time was different. The woman he loved before (and loved still) had wanted and cherished his love but was strong enough to let go. This vulnerable beauty needed love like a fish needed water. Every fiber of her being cried out for it. Even a taste would be enough. She would burn the memory of it into her heart and remember it forever.

To the outside world they were casual friends but they knew that their relationship was so much more. They were more than friends or lovers- they were the keepers of each others souls. Two fallen angels in need of salvation realizing that they had found it in each other. The knowledge of this was more than enough for her, she did not expect any more. He knew that she had forced herself be satisfied with this but he wasn't. He knew that she needed more. She needed to be seen and accepted for what she was: an intelligent, and caring person with depth and a selfless heart. It was the least of what she deserved and the most of what he could give her.

On a night they would never forget he gave her and himself the ultimate gift, thus changing both of their lives forever.

...She had walked into the office with a smile on her face but none of it showing in her eyes. In her eyes she had a sad empty look that was usually there when she thought no one was looking. When he saw this he wordlessly crossed the room and pulled her into his embrace. After his unexpected gesture he answered the question on her face with a whispered,"Don't worry, I'll be your secret." The look in his eyes told her everything she needed to know. Without hesitation she surrendered to her destiny and sealed their fate.

In the warm embrace of the night while the world went on un-caring they loved each other with everything in them. He savored her body while she hungered for his touch. They were determined to make up for everything the world had taken away or not given to them. Their love making was so intense that they wondered if any other couple in the history of the world had ever come together with such a need. When at last the ground was again beneath their feet they lay quietly sobbing in each others arms, each in their own thoughts.

...He had never felt this way before and was afraid that he would lose his soul again when he had an epiphany . This was it. After two hundred years this was his atonement. He didn't have to save the world to become human again, just someone he truly loved.

...When she opened her eyes she knew that for the first time she was truly alive. No longer did she feel an emptiness in her center like before. She felt full of hope and life, with a whole future ahead of her.

They looked into each others eyes and smiled, "Angel, You know you saved me?" He gently brushed a lock of hair off her face and said, "No Cordelia, we saved each other."


End file.
